Well I'll be damned. You're still here; all of you! Isn't that grand? I'm pretty sure you've missed my blogs. People in my real life have jumped on my case about not blogging - so here. I've returned with a new layout and all of that jazz. I was so freaking tired a few hours ago, and now I'm just wide awake. I'm going to force myself to sleep after this post. I have this OCDish kind of thing where I can't make a new layout and not post a new blog. Is that weird? It's not. Why not start fresh, you know? It just doesn't make sense to half-ass the newness. I'm sure you feel the same way as me. Like, wouldn't it bother you to come to my blog and see a new layout but not a new post? I know it'd bother me. So the new unwritten rule that's been written in this post is that if you change your layout you must have a new post! It's teh rule because I said it.

I have a lot to catch you up on, but I'd rather not. If you've been in my life - then you know what's up. It's been too much time passed and too many things have happened for me to sit here and write about it. You definitely know I don't have a stopping point when it comes to writing. If I start, I won't be able to stop. There are a few key things that I'd like to talk abou, though. Like how Twan is sporting the hell out of his mohawk! (end hate). Lol, I'm kidding. He can sport it. I know I'd look like a got-damned fool with a mohawk. I don't even want to picture that! Lol, someone photoshop me a mohawk. Sike. For real, sike. Don't go do it. Pause: I just realized it's like 5 o'clock. Wow, I can't believe this bullshit. Anyway, secondly - I was kidnapped a few days ago. By who? I'z no snitch. Just know that - yea, that doesn't go unpunished! Payback is lovely. It's the return of the bodysnatchers around here.

Valentine's Day, cough cough, ALL-STAR WEEKEND. The fuck is a Valentine's Day? I'm hella geeked about Shaq and Kobe being back together! Jesus, that's like beautiful. I'm so ready for all of the festitivites and a little bit of girlfriend time - but more basketball time. Psh, who misses All-Star weekend? "My bitch knows not to bother when the game's on." Who said that? -chuckle. I'm just kidding, she's not a bitch. Lol, did you get that backhanded "joke clarification"? Oh, I'm so good. I bet that made no sense to you. Lol, get with it bro. You won't get anywhere in life if you don't understand what I'm talking about. I'm going to rule the world someday so familiarize yourself with my style of speaking. Okay? Cool. Put that at the top of your to do list.

Shit! Son, I unlocked my iPhone! Whew! My phone shits on anything you call a mobile device. Put your G1 up to my phone and watch it politely pull down it's unlocked trousers and take a huge dump on your knock-off touch screen. I have a gameboy on my iPhone! Who walks around with a gameboy on their phone. Like a real one! The graphics on my games are so ill. Then just all of the other shit I got. Man, I'm so in love with my phone. I'm never getting rid of it. I was going to sell it to get a BlackBerry Bold - but motherfuck that ho ass phone. It's not an iPhone so it hold no flame to my love. My girlfriend can be the blackberry person of the family. I'm apple gang bang bang until I die. I'm so happy about this shit. Like, lol - I play with my phone all day now. Just figuring out shit and finding new things that I never knew that my phone could do. It's like I've been living in the matrix all of these years and I've finally taken my pill! I'm free! Jesus. Go get you an iPhone like now. For real. You don't know what you're missing.

Oh, and happy Friday the 13th. I hope you lose a limb.